Parties are a time for celebration, joy, and connection. Whether it’s a birthday, engagement, or even a pet adoption, the success of any gathering often hinges on the efforts of the host and the behavior of the guests. However, with the evolving nature of social events, some traditional etiquette rules may have been overlooked. Here are eight essential tips to ensure that both hosts and guests can enjoy a memorable and respectful party experience.
For Party Hosts
Hosting a successful event requires careful planning and consideration. Here are four expert tips from etiquette experts to help you create a positive atmosphere:
Make Changes Thoughtfully
If you need to change the venue, theme, or guest expectations after sending out invitations, it’s important to communicate these changes clearly to your guests. While some may choose to decline the invitation, it’s crucial to respect their decisions. As Diane Gottsman, founder of The Protocol School of Texas, explains, “When you change, you have to take in consideration everybody else as well.” Guests should be given the opportunity to adjust their plans if needed.Don’t Ask Your Guests for Money
While it may seem convenient to ask guests to contribute financially to cover the cost of a party, this is generally considered inappropriate. Elaine Swann, founder of The Swann School of Protocol, emphasizes that “you should not be asking people to help you pay for something that you’re hosting.” This applies especially to events where the host is responsible for organizing everything. However, in cases like group dinners at a restaurant, it might be acceptable if everyone is clear about their roles.Don’t Put Your Guests to Work
While it’s fine for guests to offer to help with setup or cleanup, hosts should not expect them to do so. Swann advises, “Don’t put people to work.” Ensure that the space is ready when guests arrive to avoid putting pressure on them to assist with preparations. Similarly, if guests offer to help clean up, make it clear that it’s not necessary.Be Present and Set Boundaries
Being fully present during the party is essential. Start the event on time and honor the guests who arrive punctually. Additionally, set clear boundaries, such as a specific time for guests to leave, to ensure a comfortable environment for everyone.
For Party Guests
While hosting can be stressful, guests also have their own responsibilities to maintain a positive experience. Here are four key tips to be a courteous guest:
Ask What You Can Bring
It’s always polite to ask if you can bring something to add to the party. Whether it’s a bottle of wine or a dessert, offering to contribute shows appreciation for the host’s effort. If the host has requested specific items, be sure to follow through. If you’re unable to bring anything, consider offering to chip in financially.Honor the Host’s Wishes
If the host explicitly asks guests not to bring anything, it’s important to follow their instructions. Swann notes that “the host has got the menu taken care of” and does not need additional contributions. Similarly, if the host declines offers to help with cleanup, respect their request and stay out of their way.Bring a Gift
Even if the host has asked guests not to bring anything, it’s still thoughtful to bring a small token of appreciation. This could be a bottle of wine, a candle, or another meaningful gift. However, avoid bringing food or drinks that may interfere with the host’s meal arrangements.Be Considerate
Respect the host’s space and resources. Avoid actions like tracking in mud or taking excessive amounts of food. As Gottsman says, “If you serve it, you eat it.” Moderation is key, whether it’s pouring a glass of wine or taking food onto your plate.